Marmite

Having nothing better to do on a Wednesday evening, I drove 90 minutes for a talk (and a free dinner) and 90 minutes back again the same evening, late at that. The talk was about the future development of ‘Greater Cambridge’ presented by the Chairman of the Cambridge Development Corporation.

Last week, I was up and down to London more times than a pogo-stick warrior on a sugar high. I went from a debate about should we abolish our monarchy (‘Mexit’), to whether we should back or bin net zero (‘Nexit’), and a reassessment of all things Brexit (‘Brexit’) almost ten years after the Glorious Revolution ... I mean 'Referendum'. (Or do I?) The following highlights aren’t what I’d anticipated I’d blog about. Just goes to show that a week of politics makes strange unintended consequences (I cannot so much mix as mash my clichés).

Premature perhaps. We’ve only just had Easter, when Christ rose from the dead. Alleluia or Bah Humbug, depending on your inclination.

Unless you’ve been impersonating Rip Van Winkle, Sleeping Beauty, Snow White or Rachel from accounts, you’ll know that Trump is waging war on Iran. This has prompted the usual keffiyeh-wearing klowns to object to a regime getting its komeuppance for torturing and murdering women and gays simply for being women and gays. The klowns’ rationale is that if Netanyahu doesn’t like the Ayatollahs, they must be the good guys even though they murder women and gays for simply being women and gays. Ah, the Hope-not-Hate brigade has been exposed for what they are: Hateful no-Hopers. Meanwhile Greta Thundabunga, the Scandinavian and female (at a stretch) clone of Chris Packham, is bleating about Cuba, thus sending the message that the war with Iran is of little consequence, and there’s no longer a climate crisis. By careering from cause to cause, just like Packham, she’s trying desperately and failing comically to be relevant and to achieve something. Anything.

I was expecting ‘it’ but not the detail of it. I certainly wasn’t expecting my reaction to it, which was sang-froid with a dollop of chocolate ice cream.

About a year ago, I penned a semi-tongue-in-cheek blog entitled Happy New Year . Judging by the polarised reactions from respective political camps it was one of my best, so I thought I’d emulate it here, complete with a one-size-fits-all trigger warning for the congenitally perpetually outraged and offended. Here then are just a few recipients of a big beautiful Merry Christmas from yours truly.

Despite being a bookworm with a penchant for 18th and 19th-century literature, I’ve only ever read two Jane Austen novels. Pride and Prejudice and Sense and Sensibility . At school. I didn’t enjoy them that much. I remember skimming the romantic passages – never being one for chick-lit – and being bored by the soul-searching and self-reflection of the middle classes. First-world problems, Darlings. Get a life. I much preferred  1984 , Animal Farm , Lord of the Flies , Brave New World , On the Road , and bodice rippers my BFF found in her big sister’s secret hiding place.

Some time ago, I was diagnosed with a liver cyst  while being investigated for something else. No, not offensive Tweets but, given that Allison Pearson is a blonde, Lucy Connolly a brunette, and I (as of Friday) am a redhead, it’s plausible that someone will eventually try and present Two Tier Keir with my head (and hair) on a platter during one of his perverted fascist rituals. TTK, you see, has a fetish for threesomes. Indeed, TTK could easily stand for Three Times Kinky. His threesomes include: persecuted right-wing ladies, lost mayoral elections, U-turns, sovereignty sell-outs, and young Romanian males.

Why did I vote Reform? Well, I promise you it wasn’t to deliberately entice more ridiculousness from the left-leaning ‘maledicts’, who never fail to inspire juicy blog material, but it has turned out to be a fruitful unintended consequence. 

To all the Trump-toasting tariff-trashers out there, like Stewart and Campbell (sounds like a re-run of the battle of Culloden) and their dumbbell devotees, here’s a simple home truth. No one knows what’s going to happen as a result of Trump’s Tariffs (TTs), because it all depends on how other nations respond. Retaliatory tariffs will have a very different outcome from a plethora of trade agreements, both including and excluding the USA. Nations also have the option of playing around with their exchange rates, interest rates and taxes. Or nuking New Jersey.

I’ve previously blogged about my personal paradigm shift where I realised, after a lifetime of worshipping at the altar of logical, predictable, universal science, that science is, in truth, unpredictable and irrational. I explained, “For me to say this is like a Christian turning away from God, a Tory voting Labour, or a once-fun person becoming a vegan.”

Wow! What a week at the Whitehouse. Zelensky and his Zealots think he was bullied, Trump’s Trumpeters think he’s king, and J D Vance’s Devotees think he was dissed.  What do I think? In the context of just that one showdown-meeting, Vance behaved badly, Zelensky behaved badly, and Trump behaved badly. In the wider context of geo-politics Russia, Ukraine, the EU and America all behaved badly. The UK, under BoJo, did better as far as it went, but with hindsight (a wonderful thing that too many claim is insight and thus are shortsighted), he should have devised a longer-term strategy for Ukraine. Maybe he did and his ‘colleagues’, uncivil servants and the EU shouted him down. Who knows what goes on behind closed doors. And therein lies the rub for the supposed ambushing of the Ukraine President: what transpired before the press conference with Zelensky? Said ambush caught experts and armchair commentators alike by surprise. Furthermore it was clumsily enacted, and the consequences wer...

‘Trump’ can mean to outdo or outflank the opposition. It stands to reason that, to achieve this, an element of surprise is required. I think it’s fair to say that so far, on the question of relations with the EU and Russia (including Ukraine, to whichever evil empire it might succumb) Trump has trumped with a series of surprises.

I’ve mentioned my gentleman friend, G, before (but not in earshot of Hubby). G’s inspired a few of my blogs, which is a bit strange, given that politically he’s to the left of me (as are most people). But sometimes he comes up with an issue that hasn’t been on my radar, or an argument that’s so clever and insightful, and civilly expressed, I just have to pursue it.

I thought I’d end 2024 and begin 2025 as ever – mischievously provocative or maliciously incendiary, depending how tetchy you’re feeling. You might consider this blog to espouse minority views, or to be so out-of-court that I should be diagnosed as neurodiverse. In either case, on the altar of Diversity, Equality and Inclusion, my blog should be tolerated, accommodated, widely disseminated and added to the school curriculum. On that note, Happy New Year to:

To its advocates, socialism aims to improve the lot of the less fortunate. To its critics, socialism is the politics of envy that, in reality, worsens the prospects of the less fortunate; its processes and outcomes include nepotism, control-freakery, deceit, bullying and unkindness. Exhibit A: Starmer Stalin. Exhibit B: history.

For a right-so-far adherent like me, I’m always on the lookout for evidence to back up my criticism of lefties. But, honestly. This Labour Government is handing me so much ammo on a platter, they’re taking the fun and challenge out of the game. Lies. Nepotism. Greed. Hypocrisy. Tone-deafness. Incompetence. Nastiness. Betrayal. Treason. In Spades! This is why I haven’t blogged for weeks – they’re giving me so much material, I don’t know where to start.

Why should people not vote Reform UK? To limit the size of Labour’s majority. That’s it. That’s the reason.

Some attribute this quote to Sir Winston Churchill, some to John Maynard Keynes. I think Nigel Farage could have said it. This weekend Farage is under fire for saying what he’s been saying since the 1990’s. What he’s been saying and what he said this weekend he is able to justify, and the facts haven’t changed. The facts are that Putin is a warmonger, and the EU/NATO has so far failed at the complex, goalpost-moving feast that is this particular geopolitical game. Farage is claiming that the EU/NATO’s ambitions eastwards and perceived flirtation with Ukraine “provoked” Putin into invading Ukraine. He didn’t say he liked Putin. In fact he said explicitly that he didn’t like him. He said he admired him as a political operative, which does not mean he thinks he’s honourable. Farage was also very clear that Putin is to blame for the invasion of Ukraine. Neither did he criticise nation states for exercising their sovereign right to – er – sacrifice their sovereignty in order to join the EU....

Got an email from a blog fan this week: “I do think that there is a blog to be done about the Starmer. Given that he seems to imply that he changed the Labour party singlehandedly, how can the businesses [who signed that letter of support] be sure he won’t get bumped out by the left? They need to beware of what they wish for. My cousin once told me that success as a barrister was down to 10% knowledge of the law and 90% acting!”